Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Lookin' for some action (figures)

Love is in the air at my house. The boys have been accruing these action figures over the past year or two, and suddenly, I find we have a whole sub-community living with us! But, as in our immediate family, the males greatly outnumber the females. And so, like in a hostage situation or something, I've quickly bonded with these women, and I feel the urge to steer them around in a motherly sort of way. I feel compelled to do a little matchmaking.
My homegirls there are Dr. Light, and Hawkgirl. I know them on a purely personal basis. Dr. Light -- obviously she's educated; Wyatt says she's a Japanese scientist. Great! I just know I like her black & white color scheme and she looks like a crazy kitty-cat in that outfit. She's got brains AND style. Rerr. Hawkgirl -- again, I don't know that much about her skills or powers. Clearly, she's accomplished & can do some sort of flying. But what struck me, when we first met, is how her lipstick (Lancome Matte Bordeaux, perhaps?) coordinates with her boots, as well as her boy-shorts. Plus, I like her pointy mask, and she's got arms like Madonna. Who wouldn't want to date these women?
So, I surveyed the prospects, and there is such a variety! But I have to admit I quickly ousted a few contenders, like Aquaman (get a haircut), and Superman (eh), and zeroed in on the two who seemed the best-suited (so to speak) to the ladies. It was pretty clear that The Green Lantern and Batman were the studmuffins of the group.

Look at them. I think there's a little magic about to occur. The Green Lantern is psyched!! But, if things don't work out, waiting in the wings we have many more men willing to go out to lunch -- and it's just lunch, we're not saving the world here -- including Wildcat, Dr. Fate, and the Green Arrow, a chivalrous throwback to Robin Hood. (I'm going to advise the girls to stay away from Lex Luthor: semi-powerful but, unfortunately, a jerk.) I can't wait to see what develops. It's like they always say: you can take the girl out of Metropolis, but you can't take Metropolis out of the girl.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Meez thinks them 2 ho's need to be introduced to a little Smooookey. Maybe pump out a few welfare smurfs. There is only one action hero on Firday.

Anonymous said...

Homey needs to shine a light for Spellcheck Man.

Anonymous said...

'Spellcheck Man' iz no superhero...ever since his infamous "wreck". You know, the one that started the saying: You better spell check yourself before you wreck yourself.